Dealing with Judgement as a Young Parent
Most young parents experience judgement from others at some point, whether it’s from strangers, co-workers, or even friends or family members. It might be a stare from a stranger, whispers at school, or more extreme examples like getting kicked out of your house by a parent. Feeling judged is never easy, but learning how to deal with it can be empowering and can help you live your best life with your child.
Five Ways to Deal with Judgement
- Be aware of the voice in your head. One step in dealing with judgement from others is recognizing when, and if, you are thinking negatively about yourself. Be confident in your abilities, and if negative thoughts start creeping in through that voice in your head, try thinking of something positive or good about yourself.
- Know your strengths. Know what you are good at and what you can improve – this is what matters and not what others say or think about you. If you are not sure about your strengths, try thinking of hobbies you like to do or things you can do on your own. Also, acknowledge that, as a parent and human, you will always be learning new things about yourself and how to care for your child. Mistakes are likely to happen, and that is okay! Just keep doing your best.
- Make yourself a priority. If you allow others’ opinions to affect how you view yourself and your actions, it can make others a priority and, in a way, gives them control in your life. Keep in mind that you know yourself better than anyone else. Avoid using precious time thinking about things that others say and will eventually forget. Focus on prioritizing yourself and your child’s needs.
- Do not let others define you. You are unique and will develop your own special style of parenting that works for you and your child. If people do not agree with your parenting style, remind yourself that is just their opinion and it does not define you. Others’ opinions lack meaning in your life as long as you are comfortable with who you are, and your baby is happy and healthy.
- Take care of yourself. Without self-care, it can be easy to dwell on others’ opinions. Practicing self-care can help you re-energize and clear your mind of negativity. Try meditating (through breathing exercises and yoga), watching a movie, or treating yourself to a snack. Taking care of yourself can also mean working on your personal growth such as learning a new skill or sharpening your strengths.
In the end, make sure your choices are based on what you believe is the most beneficial for you and your child and not on judgement from others. If you are having a difficult time thinking positively or dealing with judgement, it can be helpful to talk with a counselor. You can find counselors in health centers near you.
If you'd like to connect with other young parents, create an account on YUP! and join our judgement-free community forums.
If you'd like to connect with other young parents, create an account on YUP! and join our judgement-free community forums.
