Overstimulation & Parenting
Have you ever felt overwhelmed by all of the things going on around you? When those feelings came up did it make you feel angry, stressed, or even anxious? It is possible that in these moments you were overstimulated and that is a common feeling among parents!
What is Overstimulation?
Overstimulation is just a fancy word to explain when someone is experiencing sensory overload. This means that your brain is getting too much information from your sensory system and it is having a hard time processing it all at once. Our brains take in a lot of information all day long from our five senses (sight, taste, smell, hearing, feeling), and just like any other part of your body, it can get a little overwhelmed. This sensory overload may cause feelings of stress, fear, discomfort, feeling overwhelmed or agitated, not being able to focus, restlessness, and even feeling irritable as a result of loud sounds, strong smells, or other sensory inputs.
As a parent it is easy to get overstimulated as you move through your day. Maybe your child(ren) is making a lot of noise or throwing toys all over the place while you are trying to clean up and it is just stressing you out! Or maybe you are feeling overwhelmed because as you are trying to complete a task like school work, cooking, or cleaning, your kids are crying, cartoons are loudly playing on the tv, and your partner is trying to tell you about their day. When many things are happening at once it is easy to become overloaded with sensory inputs, which could result in your frustration boiling over by yelling, walking away, or breaking down.
Parenting While Overstimulated
When you are overstimulated it can be very hard to parent. Feelings of stress and anxiety may cause parents to disengage from things that they love or even from friends and family. Feeling agitated and irritated due to overstimulation can cause parents to have less patience with their children, yell more, or feel disconnected from their kids. Some parents may feel depressed, isolated, or inadequate when they are overstimulated, and this can lead to feeling like you are not the best parent for your child(ren). If you are overstimulated it is important to know that you are not alone! This is a common feeling, especially in parents, so taking the time to recognize what you are feeling and working through those feelings is key.
Practical Ways to Prevent Overstimulation
- Try to keep your schedules light. Overscheduling and packing too many things into your day can make you and your kids feel stressed and stress can lead to overstimulation.
- No multitasking! That may sound impossible, but when you are trying to cook dinner, plan tomorrow’s activities, and entertain your kids, it is easy to get overwhelmed and feel like you can’t handle it all. Instead, try pausing what you are doing and picking one thing to do at a time. The laundry can wait!
- Quiet time is key for you and your kids. Set aside time each day that is screen free and time for you to just catch your breath. Even if it is 5 minutes, allow yourself time to reset!
- Practice self-care. Try journaling, bubble baths, walks, or anything that you can do to take care of yourself. When you are relaxed, you can parent even better!
- Be honest about how you are feeling! It is okay to tell your kids that you are feeling overstimulated. Share what that feels like and teach them how to set healthy boundaries when they are feeling overstimulated. It is okay to let your children know that you need a “touch break” or just a moment of silence to regulate yourself. Ultimately, you are modeling healthy regulation with them and this in turn helps you to recognize what you are feeling before you get to the point of exploding!
Remember that feeling overstimulated is normal, but it doesn’t have to control you! You are a great parent, you are the parent that your child(ren) needs, and you will get through this!
