You’re Not Alone: Understanding Grief
Grief is something that almost everyone experiences in their lifetime. While it is a natural response to life, grief can be difficult to deal with and affect people in various ways.
Defining Grief
Loss is unavoidable and something that everyone goes through in life. Grief is a natural response to loss. It can be a strong, sometimes overwhelming emotion. People experience grief after things like the death of a loved one, loss of something special, a traumatic experience or a terminal diagnosis. Grief can last for a few hours or a lifetime.
Grief can feel like a deep sorrow, and for some even cause physical pain. Some grieving people may feel guilt, or shock, or anger. Some physical effects are trouble sleeping/fatigue, anxiety/depression, stomach issues, body aches/pains, and heart issues. Grieving is a personal process and impacts our lives differently. With time, support, and resources, most people learn to live with grief. It is possible to come to a place of acceptance around loss.
Grief can feel like a deep sorrow, and for some even cause physical pain. Some grieving people may feel guilt, or shock, or anger. Some physical effects are trouble sleeping/fatigue, anxiety/depression, stomach issues, body aches/pains, and heart issues. Grieving is a personal process and impacts our lives differently. With time, support, and resources, most people learn to live with grief. It is possible to come to a place of acceptance around loss.
Why We Grieve
Everyone experiences grief in different ways and for different reasons. Some common reasons why we grieve are:
- Death (loved one, friend, pet, etc.)
- Changes in or a loss of relationship (divorce, breakup, friendship, etc.)
- Miscarriage or loss of a child
- Illness or medical diagnosis
- Loss of a job or business
- Changes in finances
- Changes in your health of the health of a loved one/pet
- Other major life changes (leaving a job, moving, graduation, pregnancy/childbirth, etc.)
It is important to remember that grieving does not mean forgetting what has been lost, but rather processing and acknowledging our feelings about the loss.
Stages of Grief
Many experts believe there are five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. People will move through these stages at different speeds, and perhaps in a different order than they are listed. Everyone experiences and expresses grief in different ways.
- Denial may look like numbness, or rejection of what is happening
- Anger could be directed at self, others around, God, or the world
- Bargaining may sound like “If only…” statements, or a desire to switch places
- Depression is a deep sadness, which may prevent someone from physically and mentally continuing on in their lives
- Finally, acceptance is when the healing can begin, and the pain can be processed.
Overcoming Grief
Grief is not a one size fits all experience. It can last a few days or a few years, and it can change over time, but it is something that you can learn to cope with and heal from. Recognizing the signs, allowing time for grief, and taking care of yourself are essential in coping with grief. Remember that grief is natural and not something that you have to experience on your own. There are helplines and support groups to support people going through all different types of grief. If you or someone you know needs support with dealing with grief, the following resources may help. You may also want to create an account an reach out to them or the YUP! Forums for support.
Resources:
- National Alliance for Children’s Grief (NACG)
- Our House Grief Support Center
- Transitions Grief Care
- Jessica’s House Peer Support Groups
